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Black. I don’t wear black. Well, when I was 10, I remember I lived in a favourite black sweater for a year… I don’t wear colour. Shades, soft billowy there but not. Like memories. Hidden, buried, forgotten sometimes. Involves tripping up attic steps, creaking open a door, breathing in a lungful of dust. Dust. Covering everything. Floor. Shelves. Trunks. Great Somebody’s Or Other’s ugly lamp. Sunlight can’t creep in through dirty window. Yank open, take gasps of crisp, “decaying leaves” scented air.

Other times…memory waits to trip one at the door…or muses in a desk drawer. Memories. I sit here thinking…its funny what our mind remembers. The moments that are stored away without us knowing. Its funny too what we don’t remember. Or try not to.

I remember…warm milk with rice and sugar at Grandma’s. All the many little houses she moved in and out of when I was little. I remember…racing down the hill in our backyard in the wagon (miraculously no injuries came of it). And building fairy houses. I remember that afternoon when it poured rain and my sister and I ran out in our pyjamas to dance in it. I remember…glimpses too. Small moments that I can’t quite place.

I don’t wear black. But I play melancholy piano music.

And I light candles when there is no light.

You. Memories. Remember. Too.

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